Over the weekend, local social media feeds were awash with two particular missives from TMZ’s new DC bureau. The first was a seemingly earnest post from new-to-town producer Jacob Wasserman informing us of the wonders of the bacon, egg, and cheese sandwich at Call Your Mother.
DC people — there’s a place called Call Your Mother that makes an incredible bacon, egg and cheese. That is all 🫡 pic.twitter.com/6817bF2TMv
— Jacob Wasserman (@jacob_wass) April 18, 2026
Among the withering quote-tweets: “Guys there’s this place called Georgetown Cupcake,” and, “There’s also this great hidden gem called founding farmers that you should check out,” and, “Guys—I found this amazing hole in the wall bar called Wonderland Ballroom.” (Personally, I think the most incisive was, “How is TMZ going to disrupt coverage in DC if they’re afraid to speak truth to power when it comes to just ok bagels?”)
The following day, Wasserman outdid himself by tweeting a picture of a bowl of oatmeal with the caption, “DC people — if you’re looking to start off your day the right way, I highly recommend Tatte Bakery & Cafe. Pretty great way to celebrate one week in The District!” Promoting a much-mocked, non-local coffee chain by its full, government name was enough of a tip-off for some. The top quote-tweets are a morass of Hill reporters realizing that this has all been a troll. (Bryan Metzger of Business Insider: “this mf baiting all of us.” Andrew Solender of Axios: “oh okay they’re fucking with us.” Oriana González of NOTUS: “TMZ rage baits dc.”)
But of course they’re trolling. These people are smart. They’re tabloid reporters whose whole shtick is getting attention. TMZ DC is creating social media content that’s lab-engineered to produce engagement from smarty-pants locals. Look at Wasserman’s tweets from prior to his arrival here; there’s nothing even remotely personal, it’s just a series of posts promoting stories he’s done. Then, suddenly, he arrives on the Hill and it’s dork bait like “There’s not enough talk about how incredible DC’s public transit system is.”
Wasserman’s colleague Charlie Cotton is doing the same. He recently posted a screenshot that appears to be advice from an AI chatbot on the subject of “DC Slang,” which includes a tip to not call DC “The District” because then “people will think that you work at a think tank and wear a lanyard to dinner.” (Notably, Wasserman used “The District” in his rage-bait Tatte post.) Cotton just wants us to talk about him, and he’s doing an excellent job. Last week, he posted, “Plz help, need tips: Any decent public restroom on the Hill? Why I gotta walk back to TMZDC Hype House to take a poop??!!”
TMZ DC is funny. The outlet is reveling in content like, “EXCLUSIVE: Congressman Tim Burchett says he wouldn’t know Bad Bunny if the rapper walked up to him and asked to borrow his cell phone…and the only bad bunny he knows is his pet rabbit, who had sex on Christmas morning in front of his nephew.” And did you see that video of Cotton confronting RFK Jr. in a hallway at the Capitol, pressing him about his fascination with roadkill while a woman in his entourage tries not to laugh?
Sure, TMZ DC is branding itself as a band of silly naifs bumbling around a foreign land, exposing its oddball customs. But did you believe them last Monday when they claimed to have shown up for their first day of work, only to realize that Congress was not in session? Do you think they actually didn’t know? Or do you think that maybe emphasizing to the public that their representatives were not in their offices on the Monday after a two-week break advances the narrative that the Hill is full of gross and shocking norms ripe for TMZ to expose, like the phenomenon of politicians who can’t even be bothered to show up for work on a Monday like everyone else? It might behoove you to entertain the possibility that this operation is less Gulliver’s Travels and more Tom Wolfe.
A great asset in journalism is being underestimated. It’s strategic to show up with an aw-shucks persona and get a powerful person to talk by convincing them that you won’t have anything legitimate to ask. I mean, look at that actor from The OC who just made a smart documentary about crypto by playing a little bit dumb. If I were TMZ DC, I might want the extremely online staffers of our nation’s elected officials to be too busy mocking my trip to “Tatte Bakery & Cafe” to bother sheltering their boss from my questions. But go on, DC—persist in dunking on the TMZ guys. Proceed in assuming they’re rubes. I bet they’ll appreciate it. I bet it’ll be great for their show.
