“It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” will soon hit the airwaves, but for many people, the holidays are more a time of stress and anxiety.
“We’re asked to process not just the immediate demands of the holidays but also the cumulative weight of everything we’ve experienced over the past 12 months” says Capitol Hill therapist Monica Band. “For those who’ve faced loss, disappointment, or struggle throughout the year, this concentrated period of reflection can feel heavy.”
That’s true of any year, but it’s been a particularly stressful time for Washingtonians affected by layoffs, a federal takeover of DC, and the government shutdown—a noxious combination that can make a season that’s rife with presents (more to spend) and parties (more questions to answer) into a very taxing time.
Band recommends being mindful of how we can get tangled up in the pressure of showing care through gifts. Instead, she suggests using that tension as an opportunity to “insert some gratitude and grounding back to people and things that matter outside of work.” Gratitude doesn’t need to be an exercise in forced or toxic positivity. Instead, it can be about appreciating small things such as a cup of coffee or a walk with a friend.
Rather than trying to replicate some idealized version of the holidays, we can focus on what’s genuinely meaningful and sustainable.
If the holidays are going to look different this year, Band says, take a moment to be honest with family—kids are very perceptive, and unexplained changes can make them feel at fault. The holidays are often a period of “anticipatory anxiety,” and Band encourages people to reframe their ideas of what celebrations should entail: “Rather than trying to replicate some idealized version of the holidays, we can focus on what’s genuinely meaningful and sustainable.”
Winter in general has a gloomy reputation, especially once the holiday hangover hits. But the cold season also offers inspiration. “If we huddle close to people for warmth and community, it may soften the edges we feel throughout the year,” says Band. “I think we need that so badly here.”
This article appears in the December 2025 issue of Washingtonian.
